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  • Writer's pictureElizabeth King

Why I Don't Like the Word Infertility

I’m a fertility coach and I work with women who need support in growing their families. But you likely won’t hear me refer to your diagnosis as “infertility.” Does that surprise you?

The definition of infertility is “the inability to conceive children.”

That definition feels so closed - so final. I prefer to think about fertility as the ability to create. Whether it’s creating life or a business or art or movement or even a cake! We all have the ability to create and nurture. And we are all fertile in different ways.

When someone receives a medical diagnosis of “infertility,” it can make them feel broken, inferior, and even ashamed. Ultimately, we become what we believe we are. If you tell a child over and over again that they are bad, then eventually they will believe that and their actions will follow. In the same way, when we shame our bodies into thinking they are not enough - our body begins to believe that.

Our mental state will carry our physical state right along with it.

As a fertility coach and a teacher and mentor to other coaches through Fertility Coach Academy, I take the focus off of the body and into the mental and spiritual realm. You can read more about that here.

Here are some of my top tips for nurturing fertility:

  • Explore all of your feelings: Carve out 2-10 minutes every morning to brain dump everything you’re feeling into a journal. Don’t edit yourself and just allow whatever comes up to flow out. And if you like guided prompts, you can join my free journaling challenge here!

  • Overcome blocks: What limiting beliefs do you have around your fertility? How can you reframe those beliefs to support a positive view of your body and its ability to create? Instead of “I’m not pregnant and my body is infertile,” reframe to, “I’m not pregnant yet and I’m actively taking care of my body and mind through daily movement and meditation so I can create life and carry a healthy baby.”

  • Create a vision: Begin to visualize the life you want to create - and get specific! Write down your vision on Post-It notes and stick them up all over your house and car so you can remind yourself of it often.

What limiting beliefs do you have? What are your favorite ways to reframe a “negative” situation? If you need help getting started, send me a message on Instagram or learn more about how a Psych-K session can help here. I would love to support you in your journey!

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